Did I ever mention the time when I walked into the kitchen and saw my mum cooking and i noticed she was making alot more food than she usually does and when I asked her about it she said “SATAN IS COMING OVER FOR DINNER” and i laughed up until the doorbell rang and MY STEPFATHER CAME INSIDE WITH A DEVIL MASK ON and said “I’M HUNGRY AS HELL”
this is my favorite goofy pun ever, I have told it at least five times
I don’t care, fuck you
as you all know, saint patrick walked barefoot as an act of contrition, which made his feet rugged and blistered. he ate an ascetic’s diet, which made him weak and additionally gave him bad breath.
all of this made him
a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis
oh my god